JokesHut.com - Jokes Site Funny Jokes

 
  Home     Random Joke     Search     Top Jokes 11 Users Online | 4746 Visits Today 
 
  Select a Category:
Yo_Mama Jokes (264) Blonde Jokes (268) Insults Jokes (219) Lawyer Jokes (122) Sexuality Jokes (6) Redneck Jokes (290) Bar_Drinking Jokes (137) Animals Jokes (51) Sports Jokes (214) Foreign Jokes (211) News_Politics Jokes (179) Men Jokes (247) Women Jokes (145) Geek Jokes (91) Dirty Jokes (159)
 
 
 
 
Search Jokes
 

Site Affiliates:
IQtester.com
Gold Charms
Funny Facts

 
 

News Politics Jokes

You can achieve these resolutions

Joke Rating: rate funny jokes( 72 votes )
Views: 8800


Gain weight. At least 30 pounds.

Stop exercising. Waste of time.

Read less. Makes you think.

Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.

Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow.

Not date any of the Baywatch cast.

Spend more time at work, surfing with the T1.

Take a vacation to someplace important: like, to see the largest ball of twine.

Not jump off a cliff just because everyone else did.

Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.

Not have eight children at once.

Get in a whole NEW rut!

Start being superstitious.

Personal goal: bring back disco.

Not wrestle with Jesse Ventura.

Not bet against the Minnesota Vikings.

Buy an '83 Eldorado and invest in a really loud stereo system.

Get the windows tinted. Buy some fur for the dash.

Speak in a monotone voice and only use monosyllabic words.

Only wear jeans that are 2 sizes too small and use a chain or rope for a belt.

Spend my summer vacation in Cyberspace.

Not eat cloned meat.

Create loose ends.

Get more toys.

Get further in debt.

Not believe politicians.

Break at least one traffic law.

Not drive a motorized vehicle across thin ice.

Avoid transmission of inter-species diseases.

Avoid airplanes that spontaneously drop 1000 feet.

Stay off the MIR space station.

Get wired with high-speed net connections at home.

Associate with even worse business clients.

Spread out priorities beyond my ability to keep track of them.

Wait around for opportunity.

Focus on the faults of others.

Mope about my faults.

Rate Joke (5=Hysterical, 1=Blows)

E-Mail This

Previous Joke   Next Joke
 

 
 
Links to other Great Websites
Funnypicoftheday Jokeshut Monsterhumor Clevercomedy Hilarioushumor
Advertise with us | Copyright © 2005 JokesHut.com All rights reserved | Privacy Policy