TOP 10 REASONS HOCKEY IS BETTER THAN SEX...

10. YOU GO IN 1-2 MINUTE SHIFTS

9. THE PUCK IS ALWAYS HARD

8. THE PROTECTIVE EQUIPMENT IS REUSABLE

7. IT LASTS A FULL HOUR

6. YOU KNOW YOU ARE FINISHED WHEN THE BUZZER SOUNDS

5. YOUR PARENTS CHEER WHEN YOU SCORE

4. A 2 ON 1 OR 3 ON 1 IS NOT UNCOMMON

3. IT IS LEGAL TO PLAY PROFESSIONALLY

2. YOU CAN COUNT ON IT AT LEAST TWICE A WEEK

1. PERIODS ONLY LAST 20 MINUTES